


Of Sleeping Bags and Cloudy Nights

by NightOwl1600



Series: BNHA Bad Things Happen Bingo [1]
Category: My Hero Academia: Vigilantes - Fandom, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead Needs a Hug, Aizawa Shouta's emotional support sleeping bag, Angst, Can also be read as the end of Erasercloudmic if you really want to hurt your own feelings, Can be read as the beginnings of Erasermic, Dealing with grief and loss, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feral Aizawa Shouta (or like at least halfway feral), Gen, Implied trauma with muzzles, Me just being sad about Shirakumo, My Hero Academia: Vigilantes Spoilers, Nightmares, No editing we die like Oboro, Protective Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Protective Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic Needs a Hug, but I don't really go too far into it, can be canon compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:22:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25109173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightOwl1600/pseuds/NightOwl1600
Summary: Its been about a month since Shirakumo died in the villain attack, but Hizashi is still having nightmares about it. No one in his class knows, not even Aizawa. So Hizashi isn’t sure how he’s going to handle the over night training camp and actually having to sleep with his classmates in the same room. And considering he screams in his sleep sometimes…well he’ll just have to figure something out.(in which Hizashi screams during his nightmares about Shirakumo and tries to hide this fact from his last surviving best friend, only for said best friend to find out anyway)Bingo Card: Nightmares
Relationships: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Shirakumo Oboro, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Shirakumo Oboro & Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Shirakumo Oboro & Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic
Series: BNHA Bad Things Happen Bingo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1818565
Comments: 17
Kudos: 113





	Of Sleeping Bags and Cloudy Nights

**Author's Note:**

> Me: *checks to see if anyone that reads One More Take is here*  
> Me: *thinks coast is clear*  
> Me: *posts a new fic knowing very well that I have not posted my weekly updates for my other fic for the past two weeks but have posted another 5 chapter fic and this new fic*
> 
> This was supposed to be less than 2000 words and I went 5k+. I miss the days where I could write 2ks and think it was enough for me to completely capture a story. But it will never be enough now.

“Yamada, are you going to the training camp?” Aizawa asks one day out of the blue while the two of them are in study hall. Hizashi is surprised by this. Nowadays, it seems so hard to get his friend talking about anything.

“Don’t really know yet,” Hizashi answers evasively. He’s purposely leaving an opening for himself in case he needs to back out last minute considering his…issue. He taps his pencil on the table. “How about you Aizawa? Are you planning on going?”

Aizawa shrugs. “I think it would be helpful to sharpen my skills.” There he goes again. Aizawa rarely ever talks anymore, but when he does, its usually all centered around hero work or training. “But I’m not sure I want to deal with being around other people. Especially overnight.”

“Haha! I get what you mean,” Hizashi replies. Even though his words sound empty, Hizashi really does get what Aizawa means this time. For Hizashi at least, spending staying overnight having to sleep there with his classmates and teachers around. As much as that sounds fun, it wouldn’t be the same without…

…without Shirakumo.

Even now, a month later, its so hard to think about him. And when he’s not thinking about how much he misses Shirakumo? He’s having nightmares about the day he died and how his voice quirk indirectly contributed to that. If only Hizashi had thought twice about letting loose that day. If even one of the Buster Union heroes had thought to check the database they would’ve known not to attack like they did. Shirakumo would still be alive…

Hizashi pushes the thoughts out. Not here, not now. Not in front of Aizawa.

“I think you should go,” Hizashi says abruptly, trying very hard not to think about that day. “You’ve been trying really hard to improve lately, especially since you started training on your own. The training camp will be a good way to measure your progress, even if you have to deal with other people, which by the way, is kinda necessary in hero work too, Aizawa.” Hizashi humorously elbows his friend in the ribs.

He’s expecting Aizawa to do his signature eye-roll or try to push him off, but instead, Aizawa gives Hizashi a puzzled look. Hizashi isn’t sure what that’s supposed to mean. “I guess you’re right,” Aizawa replies dismissively. “I just don’t want to get dragged into all the group activities and stuff.”

“Aw, come on! That’s the best parts!” Hizashi exclaims with a smile. “Sharpening your skills is important, but so is being able to relax and get a good laugh!”

“So does that mean you’re going?” Aizawa narrows his eyes at Hizashi. “You always love these kinds of trips.”

Of course Hizashi is into the whole training camp thing. Its their last year and a fun school activity he always looks forward too, but it won’t be the same anymore without Shirakumo. Coupling that with his current sleep issues, he just isn’t feeling it as much as he used to.

Not that he’ll ever tell Aizawa that. “I mean, yeah I guess,” Hizashi grins in an attempt to dissuade any of Aizawa’s suspicions. “I, uh, I don’t see why not.”

Aizawa doesn’t smile. He just nods and seemingly drops his suspicions. “Guess we’re both going then.”

“Nice!” Hizashi forces himself to say, but truth be told, he’s dreading the trip.

* * *

There is definitely something up with Yamada and Shouta knows this. He just doesn’t exactly know what.

That’s a lie. He knows its probably something to do with the villain attack at Tasomiya that… that killed Shirakumo. Its not something Shouta likes thinking about, despite it always being present like some kind of background noise in his mind. The wounds are still so fresh and Shouta really doubts they’ll ever heal.

But Yamada was always different than him when it came to, well, everything. Of course he knows that Yamada is mourning too, but if the past month was anything to go by, than Shouta would say that Yamada is handling things well enough. He seems to be doing okay and is picking up right where they left off, even if Shirakumo isn’t around anymore, at least that’s what Shouta had thought. But now he isn’t so sure.

It all started when they announced the overnight training camp trip. Its one of Yamada’s favorite school activities, but when they announced it this year, Shouta swears he saw Yamada frown. He’s not going to pretend he doesn’t know why. Without Shirakumo, everything fun they did together was now tinged with sadness. But Shouta thinks Yamada needs this trip more than anybody.

Shouta knows he’s not exactly the best company, let alone friend. It was always Shirakumo and Yamada that brought life to their trio, and now that Shirakumo was gone, Shouta hasn’t seen Yamada smile that much. He misses seeing Yamada smile almost as much as he misses Shirakumo.

Its complicated, but Yamada could use a reason to smile. Not his fake persona smile, but a real genuine smile like he used to. Shouta can’t provide that, but the training camp can, which is why it surprised Shouta so much that he had to convince Yamada to go.

And maybe Shouta was also being a little bit selfish too. He wanted to go on the trip to sharpen his skills, but he didn’t want to go without Yamada. The idea of going without Shirakumo already made him upset, but going without Yamada too? Shouta isn’t sure if he could handle it. Its just reminds him of everything they’ve lost.

He doesn’t want to loose Yamada to grief too.

Which brings Shouta back to the present. Currently, the class is about ready to settle in for the night. After a long day of different outdoor training and activities, everyone is exhausted. Shouta has to admit though, the training was very helpful and the group activities seemed to make Yamada happy, even if he had to drag Shouta around to some of them. Whatever.

But now that the day was coming to a close, Shouta can’t help but notice Yamada acting more jumpy than usual, which is strange. He’s still very vibrant and lively, and if you didn’t know him well enough you wouldn’t notice anything wrong, but Shouta notices. Yamada keeps glancing around to their roommates, as if he’s scared of them or something.

The two of them are sharing a room with their class president Iida Tensei, and three other guys from the other section. Shouta recognizes one of these guys. He’s that asshole Sensoji’s friend.

Shouta swears. If that jerk is messing with Yamada now just because Shouta ‘proved’ himself by defeating Garvey or whatever, then there will be hell to pay. Once everyone is asleep, Shouta will get up and ask Yamada in private.

He’ll just take a quick nap first.

* * *

Hizashi has a plan now: sleep outside. Its not a foolproof plan, but its better than having a nightmare and waking everyone up in the middle of the night when he accidentally activates his quirk in his sleep. He doesn’t want to make his friends’ ears bleed by mistake.

Its dark out and he’s pretty sure everyone is asleep now. Carefully and quietly, Hizashi pulls out his backpack and throws in a blanket, a small pillow, and some duct tape. He then very cleverly places his remaining belongings on his bed in such a way it looks as if someone is still there, so in case anyone wakes up, it will seem like he’s asleep. He also leaves his signature shades on the nightstand beside the bunk bed. If this was to look believable, his shades can’t be missing. Plus, its dark out and shades would definitely not help his vision.

Ever so silently, Hizashi heads to the window and climbs out, leaving it open just a crack so that he can get back in when he returns. If he comes back before anyone is awake, no one will know he even left, and at least this way he can get some sleep without putting other people in danger.

Hizashi makes his way towards the woods, putting some distance between him and his classmates. If he’s too close to the building and screams in his sleep, everyone will still hear him. He doesn’t want anyone to know about his nightmares, especially Aizawa. Aizawa is already having a much harder time moving on than he is, the last thing his friend needs are his problems adding on to the ones they already have.

Trekking through the woods, Hizashi only now realizes that maybe he should have brought a flashlight with him. Its dark and really hard to see where he’s stepping. Before he knows it, Hizashi is tumbling down a hill and face-planting into a tree.

Great. Exactly what he needed tonight.

All in all, the place he landed in isn’t that bad. Actually, it’s a perfect spot to sleep for a little bit. That, and also he’s a little sore from training and falling down that hill. And just maybe, his ankle feels a little worse than it did before tripping. He’s just too tired to put in any more effort tonight.

“Guess this is far enough from everyone,” Hizashi mutters to himself as he sets up his blanket and pillow.

Once everything is ready, the last thing he pulls out of his bag is the duct tape. Hizashi takes a deep breath. “Just some extra precaution, to stop you from screaming and hurting anyone,” he tells himself. “No one is forcing you to do this. You can take it off whenever you want.” Despite the self-peptalk, his nerves have not been quelled.

It doesn’t really matter. He already decided on doing this even before they got on the bus today. Hizashi unrolls some tape and rips the length off, then ever so gently places the strip over his closed mouth, effectively sealing his mouth shut for the night.

It takes all of Hizashi’s concentration not to panic. He _hates_ this, hates having anything on that gags or muzzles him because of his quirk. Its inhumane and cruel and—but this time is different. This time its Hizashi’s choice, and its for the greater good of his classmates and his own dignity. No one is ever going to know about this or his nightmares. Just for one night, he can deal with being shut up.

Hizashi puts the roll of duct tape back in his bag and then lies down on the pillow. He wonders what Shirakumo would think of him if he found out what Hizashi was doing. Would he be worried? Disappointed at Hizashi’s weakness?

Just add those to other questions Hizashi will never have the answer to. He misses Shirakumo more than anything, but he hopes that tonight at least, he won’t have to dream of his dead best friend.

* * *

Shouta wakes up in the middle of the night, exactly when he planned to. He’s the type of person whose body clock functions as he wills it. It’s the perfect time too. It seems like everyone else in the room is asleep, so now Shouta can talk to Yamada in private and finally figure out if Sensoji and his friends are bullying Yamada. If they are, Shouta will not take this offense lightly.

He quietly gets out of the top bunk and makes his way down to Yamada’s below him. It looks like Yamada is asleep, but Shouta thinks this is worth waking him up for. Its what Shirakumo would have done for them, he thinks, probably? Shouta gets right next to Yamada’s head and tries shaking his shoulder.

“Yamada,” he whisper-shouts. “Yamada, its Aizawa. Wake up, I have to ask you a question. Its important.” Something isn’t right. Shouta doesn’t know what, but something is off about this. “Yamada?”

Shouta pulls off the blanket covering his friend, only to reveal his friend is not in bed. In Yamada’s place is a pillow dressed up in his clothes. Shouta freaks out just a little bit.

“Yamada?!” he hastily whispers into the rest of the room, but when he glances around, his friend is nowhere to be found. There is, however, a slightly open window that goes out into the woods.

Maybe its not anything bad. Maybe Yamada snuck out with some of their other classmates for some secret group activity and didn’t ask Shouta because he knows Shouta would just say no. That sounds plausible.

But then why was Iida Tensei still here? Surely Yamada wouldn’t leave Iida out of a group activity.

And then there’s something else. Right beside Shouta, on the table next to the bed lies Yamada’s favorite shades. Yamada absolutely hates parting with those things. He’d never willingly leave those behind. Shouta carefully picks them up. His hands are shaking just a tad as he goes over the implications for what this might mean.

_If this is some kind of cruel prank by Sensoji—_

No. Shouta needs to focus, push all that anger into something useful. Yamada might be out in the woods being made a fool of. Shouta’s first thought is to wake up Iida and then get a teacher, but that might be exactly what Sensoji wants. Have everyone make a big fuss over Yamada to embarrass him when they do find him.

No, its better that Shouta just goes to look for him. Yamada will appreciate it’s a friend that comes to find him instead of their whole goddamn class. The next thing that comes to Shouta’s mind is to wake up Shirakumo for help. Yamada won’t mind if the two of them come. Shirakumo knows Yamada like the back of his hand, so he’ll know how to comfort Yamada when they find him. Shouta turns around to wake up Shirakumo, but then reality comes crashing down on him again.

Shirakumo isn’t here anymore. Its just him and Yamada.

Well, now its just him.

He misses Shirakumo. He misses seeing Yamada smile like he was actually happy. He misses the way things used to be.

Shouta shakes himself out of his own pity party. Shirakumo would be disappointed if Shouta let his sadness get in the way of helping Yamada. He can’t let his own stupid feelings get in the way of everything. He needs to focus on the task at hand. Its what Shirakumo would have wanted, probably, maybe? Shouta doesn’t really know.

The only thing Shouta can think of doing is heading out to find Yamada on his own. Before he slips out the window, however, he quickly grabs Yamada’s shades, a flashlight, his capture weapon, and his sleeping bag. He can’t exactly say why he feels so compelled to bring the sleeping bag everywhere. Its just comforting to have it close.

Gathering all these things in his bag, he throws the straps over his back and heads out the window. Hopefully Yamada isn’t too far out.

As Shouta walks through the woods alone, his mind wonders a bit. He hadn’t realized how lonely it would be just by himself. He hadn’t thought that he’d miss Yamada’s presence so much. Even when he’s not paying attention, Yamada is always there somewhere, either having a mostly one-sided conversation or just beside Shouta these days. It feels weird to be all by himself.

He doesn’t like it.

Shouta sighs at the thought. Shirakumo would probably think it’s a good thing that Shouta doesn’t like being alone. Heck, if Shirakumo were here now, he’d probably have already realized Sensoji and his gang were bullying Yamada and have found a way to put them in their place. For probably the millionth time this month, Shouta wonders what would have happened if he had died that day and Shirakumo had lived instead.

He pushes those thoughts aside. It was illogical to think about ‘what ifs.’

Suddenly, in the corner of his eye, something moves. He turns to see what caused the commotion, only to be greeted by a familiar head of blonde hair just a few feet below him at the bottom of a hill. That’s definitely Yamada.

Shouta carefully slides down until he’s right beside his friend. Upon closer inspection, it seems like Yamada is a little roughed up. He’s got some small scraps on his arm, smudges of dirt on his clothes, and leaves in his air, but that isn’t all. Yamada seems to be asleep, but he’s quivering and twitching like he’s having a nightmare.

However, all these details dull in comparison to the horror Shouta finds on Yamada’s face. Covering his friend’s mouth is a long, thick piece of duct tape that completely seals Yamada’s mouth, making it impossible for him to open it, to speak.

Bullying and playing a prank on Yamada was one thing, but this…this is so, so much worse.

_How. Dare. They._

Did they even know how much pain they caused Yamada?

Did they know how much trauma Yamada has with being gagged and muzzled?

Did they know and think it was funny?! After everything that had happened to him during the passed month—they lost a friend and someone thought it would be _funny to_ _duct tape Yamada’s mouth closed_?!

Shouta doesn’t care if he gets expelled. Whoever did this to Yamada is going to pay.

First things first though, he needs to check if Yamada is more injured than he seems. He finds his calm and gently tries to wake up his best friend.

“Yamada, wake up,” Shouta shakes him. “I want to know who did this to you.”

* * *

_Hizashi is dreaming again. He knows this, but the dread and the fear and the helplessness are too real._

_“Hizashi!” Dream-Shirakumo calls out to him. “Come on! We’re gonna go defeat some villains!”_

_Hizashi can’t say anything. Whenever he tries to talk the voice gets trapped in his throat and there’s no sound. He can’t tell Shirakumo to stop._

_“What’s wrong Hizashi?” Dream-Shirakumo asks innocently. “Its time for you to let loose! Firing everything you’ve got at that dinosaur looking villain over there!”_

_Like these nightmares usually go, Garvey appears a couple meters away from them, already knocking down buildings. He wants to tell Shirakumo that letting loose is the worst idea ever, but his voice won’t cooperate._

_“You’re quirk isn’t working?” Dream-Shirakumo questions with a naïve look on his face, as if he can’t see Hizashi’s obvious panic and distress. “Weird. Sore throat? Maybe you should sit this one out. Don’t worry. I’ll go into the most dangerous part of the battlefield and save the kids from falling debris while undermining my own safety. It will probably be fine, right? Its not like a building is going to crush me or something.” With a smile and a wave, Dream-Shirakumo quickly lifts off on his cloud and disappears into the chaos._

_Hizashi is running after him but he knows he won’t catch up. In these kinds of dreams he never does, but he tries anyways. He tries calling out to his friend, telling him to come back, begging him not to leave. It never works._

_Finally, when his voice does return, it returns with more power than he intends. “SHIRAKUMO!!” he shouts, but that’s always the fatal mistake: Hizashi opening his stupid mouth. The minute the word leaves his mouth, the entire world beings to crumble. Everything is falling down and in the distance he can see it. Shirakumo is already lying dead on the ground, with a blood soaked boulder beside him. Once again, it’s Hizashi’s fault._

_“SHIRAKUMO! I’M SORRY!” Hizashi cries. “I DIDN’T MEAN TO! I’M SORRY! PLEASE COME BACK–”_

“Yamada!”

Hizashi jolts upright about to scream, but there’s something keeping his mouth shut. He panics.

“Stop, its just me. Its Aizawa,” a calm voice coaxes him out of his panic. Aizawa sits beside him with a grounding hand on his shoulder. His friend has erasure activated on Hizashi, likely to stop him from screaming from the scare. “I think you were having a nightmare.” Aizawa states plainly.

Hizashi breathes for a second and tries to make sense of things. He’s in the woods and there’s duct tape on his mouth. Then he remembers, he did all of that on purpose. With this in mind, he takes a deep inhale through his nose and calms down.

“Can I take that off?” Aizawa asks, startling Hizashi a bit. For a second he forgot Aizawa was even there. Aizawa is pointing at the duct tape on his mouth. He hadn’t notice at first, but now that he’s actually looking at Aizawa, Hizashi can see his friend is incredibly pissed off for some reason.

Hizasih reddens in embarrassment but nods.

“This is going to hurt, but I’ll keep my erasure on so you don’t have to worry about your quirk,” Aizawa tells him before he rips off the tape. Hizashi makes a small yelp but nothing more. He doesn’t think he can even say anything after being caught like this.

After that, Aizawa just sits there starring at Hizashi like he’s trying to decipher a puzzle. He looks angry. Really angry. Maybe its because Hizashi left him and didn’t say anything? Or maybe it’s because Aizawa had to come all the way out here to find Hizashi in the middle of the night? Hizashi knows how much his friend has been valuing sleep recently. He’d hate to think his problems ate into Aizawa’s sleep schedule.

Hizashi avoids eye contact and prepares himself to hear Aizawa’s disappointment or anger or annoyance, however what Aizawa actually says surprises him.

“Who did this to you?” Aizawa questions intensely.

Hizashi raises an eyebrow, confused by the question. “What?”

“Who did this to you?” Aizawa picks up the strip of duct tape and points at it aggressively. “I don’t care who they think they are. They won’t get away with this.”

Hizashi can see the misunderstanding. “Aizawa, wait. Its not what you think—”

“Don’t lie,” Aizawa chastises sternly. It almost reminds Hizashi of a teacher. “If there’s someone picking a fight with you, then they’re picking a fight with me too.”

“I’m not lying, Aizawa,” Hizashi slumps in defeat. “No one is picking on me. I did this to myself.”

“What?” Aizawa stares in shock.

“Look its kind of complicated.” Hizashi tries to explain without having to reveal too much. Aizawa doesn’t need more emotional baggage. “I’m just having nightmares and sometimes I scream, so I wanted to make sure I didn’t accidentally hurt anybody.”

“You didn’t used to have that problem on our other overnight trips,” Aizawa easily sees through Hizashi’s mask. “Are your nightmares about…him?”

Hizashi knows exactly to whom Aizawa is referring to. “Yeah,” he sighs. “I miss him a lot.”

There’s a very calming and solemn type of silence that fills the void between them. It’s a gap that used to be filled by a third, loud, lively, rambunctious boy who liked blue skies and sunshine and always wore a smile even when facing off against bullies or villains. He was the type of guy that knew exactly what to do to make everyone feel better and was able to pull others along powered solely by happiness. If he were here now, he would have already found a way to fix this whole situation with a simple laugh, or at least Hizashi thinks he would have.

But he isn’t here and he won’t be here ever again. They have to move on.

“Listen Aizawa,” Hizashi speaks up after a few minutes of quiet. “You should head back to the room. I promise I’ll be back before anyone wakes up. Its easier and safer for me and everyone if I stayed out here for the night.”

Aizawa looks uncertain about the suggestion. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure,” Hizashi answers with a sad grin. “I wouldn’t want any getting hurt because of me.” _Like Shirakumo was_. “I’ll be fine out here. I promise.”

Aizawa frowns but nods and begins making his way back to the room. Hizashi gives his friend a wave and a lopsided grin. It’s better this way.

Once he thinks Aizawa has left, Hizashi begins to rearrange his things and pulls out the roll of duct tape again. He peals off the same amount of length he used last time and readies himself to put the strip back on. However before he can, a hand snags the offensive tape out of his hold.

“What the—” Hizashi looks up and finds Aizawa is back, now crumpling up the new strip of tape into a ball and throwing it far away from them. “Aizawa, I told you. Its my choice to do this. I’m fine—”

Hizashi doesn’t finish his sentence. Instead, Aizawa pulls out his sleeping bag from his backpack and proceeds to rip the thing from the middle down so the burrito fold becomes a singular blanket-like shape.

“What are you doing?” Hizashi asks. “Are you just trying to show off how jacked you are now? We all know already, there’s no need to rip your sleeping bag down the middle to prove it,” he jokes.

Aizawa pointedly ignores Hizashi and instead sits down next to him so that they’re shoulder to shoulder and folds the blanket-like sleeping bag around the two of them.

Its…nice. And fluffy.

“If you’re going to stay out here, then so am I,” Aizawa declares rather stubbornly, but refuses to make eye contact with Hizashi. “It’s a bad idea to sleep by yourself in the woods where something or someone could attack you. You won’t have back up. And if you duct tape your mouth you’re already putting yourself at a disadvantage.”

“Aizawa…” Hizashi mutters. “I appreciate the concern, but the school already made sure this place is safe. Nothing is going to get me here. Plus, if you stick around, my quirk could activate and hurt you. You won’t be able to sleep and I might accidentally break your eardrums or something.”

“Its fine,” Aizawa states. “I sleep all the time now so I’ll just catch up on sleep whenever. If you start screaming in your sleep, then I’ll just erase your quirk so it doesn’t break my eardrums or alert anyone else. This way you won’t have to wear…that.” Aizawa points with disgust to the roll of duct tape in Hizashi’s bag.

“Aizawa,” Hizashi urges. “You don’t have to do this—”

“Just shut up and listen first,” Aizawa interrupts and Hizashi immediately stops talking. Aizawa closes his eyes and pinches his eyebrows together like he’s struggling to find the right words to say. “I don’t know what he…what Shirakumo would have done in this situation. He’d probably already have found a way to fix this, but I’m not Shirakumo. I don’t know what to say to make you feel better. I just—”

Aizawa rubs his eyes aggressively and Hizashi pretends he doesn’t see the wetness that leaks out from them. Hizashi sniffles and begins to feel hot tears fill his eyes as well.

Aizawa continues. “I don’t know how to do this without Shirakumo. I don’t know what he would have done or said. All I know is that this is what I can do.” He gestures at the sleeping bag and then himself. “I doubt this is what he would have done, but its all I can think of.” Finally, Aizawa looks Hizashi in the eyes with as much genuineness as he can muster. “I miss him a lot too. If there was a way I could bring him back I would, but I’m sorry that I can’t. I’m sorry I can’t fix anything. I’m sorry that I don’t know what Shirakumo would have said. All I can do is be here. I’m sorry that will never be enough.”

The two of them sit there in silence, mourning what they’ve lost. Its sad and heartbreaking as it always is to think about him, but this time was different. Hizashi can’t quite figure it out, but right now doesn’t feel like the other times he’s thought about Shirakumo. He still misses Shirakumo a lot, but this time, he doesn’t feel alone in that emptiness.

“I don’t know what he’d say either,” Hizashi replies after a moment of silence. His voice is shaky and wet but he keeps pushing forward. “But I think you’re wrong. I mean, you’re right for some parts; there’s not much we can do to fix anything. And no matter what we do, this won’t get better overnight.”

Hizashi spares a glance at Aizawa. His friends face is grim and downdraught, as if Hizashi’s words are the final nail to the metaphorical coffin.

Hizashi quickly explains further. “But I think you’re wrong too. This,” Hizashi gestures to the sleeping bag, Aizawa, then himself. “I think this is enough, even if only for tonight.”

Hizashi lets those words hang in the air, letting both of them process everything: the hurt, the pain, the loss, but also just the fact that they haven’t lost everything. Life won’t go back to the way it was, but it can be better than now, even if it will never be the same as before. It can get better. The two of them are still here, still together, even if they’re missing their last piece, and at least for tonight, that could be enough.

“Thanks for coming out to look for me,” Hizashi bumps their shoulders together. “I’m glad you’re here Aizawa.”

“Just do me a favor and don’t go missing again,” Aizawa states as he looks up at the night sky. “You really scared me. It felt like I’d lost another friend.”

“Geez, I was only gone for like, an hour or something,” Hizashi jokes. “Next time I’ll wear a bell-collar around my neck like a cat so you can hear me coming and going.”

“You’re already too loud as it is,” Aizawa replies dryly. “Plus, Kayama might think you’re stealing her style with the whole collar gimmick.”

Hizashi bursts out laughing and Aizawa has to act quickly to erase his quirk before his voice wakes up the entire forest. “D-did you just—” Hizashi manages to get out through his wheezing laughs.

“Shhhh!” Aizawa tries to silence his friend, but the minute he looks at Hizashi giggling face, Aizawa can’t help but smile too. “Its fine to laugh but at least try to keep it down,” he pleads even as he chuckles a little bit as well.

“Shirakumo would have loved that joke,” Hizashi remarks lightheartedly.

“He thinks everything is funny. Speaking of, I think he’d be appalled to find out you left these on the bedside table.” Aizawa hands Hizashi his favorite pair of shades. “It really freaked me out when I saw you left them there. You rarely go anywhere without them.”

“You brought these with you?” Hizashi smiles. Aizawa can be such a softie sometimes. “You know, its kind of irrational to wear shades at night.”

“As if you’re the rational one between the two of us,” Aizawa rolls his eyes.

That makes Hizashi laugh again. “Fair point, but you’re the one that ripped your own sleeping bag in half just to show off your muscles. If you wanted to stay warm I have a blanket right here we could have used.”

“Blankets aren’t the same as sleeping bags. They are fundamentally different in terms of fabric and comfort.” Aizawa defends his sleeping bag.

Hizashi snorts at Aizawa’s offended face. “Okay I guess you’re right. Actually, this sleeping bag is kind of comfy,” Hizashi says as he snuggles further into the fabric. “I can see why you like it so much. Its soft and warm and fluffy. It kind of reminds me of…” Hizashi trails off at the thought, suddenly realizing why Aizawa likes sleeping in it so much.

“Shirakumo’s clouds,” Aizawa finishes Hizashi’s sentence.

“Yeah.” Hizashi replies solemnly, but he isn’t sad this time. Its hard to explain the feeling, but its kind of like a happy-sad. Their time with Shirakumo was over and there was nothing the two of them could do about it. All they could do now is remember their friend who liked blue skies and sunshine and sushi and cats.

And if that’s all they could do for Shirakumo now, then Hizashi thinks it’s best to remember him fondly. Shirakumo lived his life a happy person, a good hero, and a great friend. Hizashi decides not to let his grief and loss cloud over everything their friend had been and stood for.

Hizashi looks up at the sky and smiles. “It’s a bit cloudy tonight, isn’t it Aizawa?”

“Yeah,” Aizawa hums, looking up to the starlit darkness as well.

The two of them stay like that for the rest of the night, sleep be damned. As the young heroes look up at that cloudy night sky, they remember their friend fondly. With the soft fabric of the sleeping bag and the clouds covering the stars, it was almost as if Shirakumo really was there with them, reaching out somehow from wherever he was.

One night wasn’t going to change anything. Tomorrow, Aizawa would probably go back to training himself to the ground and Hizashi would probably go back to masking his feelings as best he could, but perhaps for right now, they could enjoy the night and hope that maybe they can make tomorrow better.

At least for tonight, this was enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Me: *writes about how it felt like Shirakumo's spirit is there with them*  
> Also me: *knows full well where Shirakumo actually is and its not a happy place guys*
> 
> So this is the first installment of my BNHA Bad Things Happen Bingo card! The prompts on my card are pretty light (as opposed to others holy shit guys it gets dark in that generator), and I will be writing those prompts with the lightness akin to this fic. I'm just really not into dark writing that much. Hurt/Comfort for the win.
> 
> Also, I know my tags can be kind of confusing. If you read my work, you know I'm not exactly a shipper of anything (platonic relationship crew, where u at?) but if you want to read it as Erasermic or Erasercloudmic, be my guest! I can't really stop you either way so do it. Love what you love.
> 
> If you want to see the rest of the bingo prompts head on over to my tumblr! I got a few ideas for some, but if you guys have any ideas that might inspire me let me know in my ask (no promises though!!). 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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